Sunday, December 16, 2007

On Friendship...

I saw this list the other day in a book called "Lists to Live By." I thought it was pretty good and I'd like to share it.

How to Build a Friendship With Someone You're Dating (or just being friends with someone of the opposite sex)


  1. Keep physical contact to a minimum.

  2. Explore new interests and hobbies.

  3. Do activities that are fun.

  4. Be yourself - don't put on an act just to get the person to like you.

  5. Ask open-ended questions.

  6. Listen to the other person's heart, not just to the words.

  7. Talk with a godly older couple and discover how they built their friendship.

  8. Read a good book together, and discuss how its content can help you foster your relationship.

  9. Seek to understand the other person's viewpoint.

    (Dick Purnell from Decision Magazine)


I know one of the main things that drew me into friendship with my (now) husband was his respect of my personal space "bubble." That was a big thing for me, that he would give me that space so I wasn't always on gaurd and could be myself. It, in turn, helped me respect him for his values too. The fact that we shared Christ was another strength of our friendship, as was his willingness to serve others and share a smile.


While we have had our ups and downs and dissagreements, just like any other couple, I'm still so grateful for the friendship we shared before we were even serious! I know one of the things we both (individually) had declared to God, was that we weren't going to activily seek a boyfriend/girlfriend at that time in our lives. That God was to be our passion, and He had created us for a purpose and a place. I knew that I should be content with Him, and rely on Him in that area. It was after a long talk with God that I was at peace, and it was a couple months after that, that He really blessed me with the beginnings of a friendship with Mathew.


I know every relationship is different, but just keep in mind that God really does want to be first in our lives. He will lead and guide. Use your head. Don't jump to conclusions. Have some guidelines. Develop a pure friendship. and most of all, keep God first!

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